“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11).

Most of us go through life with the self at the center. Everything happening in life is viewed through the lens of how it impacts us personally. I don’t think we do this because we are egotistical monsters. It’s just the only way human beings know how to process life.

But as we grow and mature, we learn to see life through the lens of others. We realize that life isn’t just about us, that there is more to life and everyone experiences life differently. That is exactly what it means to grow up and mature – we gain the capacity to put ourselves in the shoes of others. When we do, the question shifts. The question in life shifts from “Why?” to “What?” 

Instead of asking “Why is this happening to me?” we gain the capacity to ask “What am I to learn from this?” And when you start growing as a Christian, instead of asking “Why is this asking to me?” we learn to ask, “What is God trying to teach me through this?”

As we mature we move from “Why?” to “What?” that shift makes all the difference in the world. 

Change your question and change your life. 

“I in them and you in me – so that they may be one as we are one” (John 17:23).

Have you ever thought:

“If only I had gotten that new job I would be so much happier.” 

“If only I had not taken this job everything would be okay.” 

“If only I lived in our dream house I would be so happy.”

“If only I had that fancy new car I would be so happy.”

“If only I could marry a person like that I would be so much happier”

You already know that this is foolishness. We have been down this road so many times in our lives and we have actually gotten that new job, and we’ve lived in our “dream house”, and we’ve bought that fancy new car only to discover that you were still you! Nothing changed. The happiness and joy from that new toy or job or spouse is fleeting. It is so temporary.

Jesus tells us that the secret to happiness is not out there, but it has everything to do with what’s inside of us – Is Jesus in you? The key to living a purposeful, joy filled life is Christ in me. 

Is Jesus in you? 

I don’t have a verse of the day. But this is something I’ve been giving much thought to lately.

We live in a world where we are so divided that we are no longer able to speak with one another nor hear one another. Spouses, friends, families are no longer able to speak about some things because we are so far apart on our convictions. We are so convinced we are right that anyone who doesn’t see the world the way we see the world are wrong.

There is nothing wrong with convictions. They are good and necessary. But when we place convictions on things that ought to be beliefs, we get into trouble.

There are things that are black and white:

• For instance, things that are black or white. Black is black. It is either black or it is not.
• Or, God is God. That’s it. There are no other options.

But not all things are black and white. In fact, most of the world and issues we deal with are not black and white. They are all kinds of shades of gray. That’s why we use the language – “Here’s what I think…” “This is what I believe…” But when we use language that way, we are also saying this is what I think to the best of my ability with the knowledge and information I currently possess. AND I am open to being corrected given better information.

When we use black and white convictions in the area of gray…well…that’s just foolish.

So what are things that are gray? I am glad you asked. Anything other than the essentials (Jesus is the only way to God, God is God and we are not, the Bible is the only authority, etc.) fall into the category of gray. For instance:

• Modes of baptism – dunking, pouring, sprinkling
• Forms of worship – contemporary, traditional
• Women in leadership
• Denominations
• Etc.

One of the reasons why I think our country is so divided and we are so unable to speak and hear one another is because we keep using the language and attitude of conviction in areas that are gray.

When a person is absolutely convinced they are right, then anyone who sees the world differently is wrong. That is perfectly fine in things that are black and white. But, in the areas that are gray…that’s just sad…for the person who’s convinced they are right and for everyone around them.

There are things that belong in the black and white category. Jesus is the only way to salvation. God is God and we are not. The Bible is the only authority. But pretty much everything else belongs in the shades of gray and it is inappropriate to attach black and white convictions.